I was just recently having a conversation with a friend about our kids. We were talking about how we as parents influence our children’s behaviours, (with or without ASD). Whether we like it or not we play an enormous role in our children’s lives and we should strive to lead by example and earn respect rather than by commanding and expecting. Certainly it is not only our influence that affects their behaviour but we do play a major role.
Anyway during the conversation I remember saying how having a child with Autism has taught us – (the parents) so much about bringing up children and about life in general.
There is no doubt that when we learned that Isy was in the Autism Spectrum of disorders our family unit became so much more united and stronger. We banded together and we were determined right from the start that we were going to overcome the many obstacles that a disability like Autism can present, and come out better for it.
Below is a list of just some of the things that we as parents have learned from our Autistic child:
- Acceptance – accept your child for who they are. They are all beautiful in their own way. Just because they are different doesn’t mean they are less. Different is good!
- Tolerance – sometimes it is hard to understand why they are getting upset or frustrated, but when you take the time to understand you can see that it all makes sense. At times you have to be extremely tolerant, but that teaches you something very valuable – Tolerance!
- Humour – you have to have a good sense of humour to survive having a child with Autism. If you don’t have one you will soon obtain one otherwise you will just go insane. I always say laughter cures everything, and I strongly believe it. With Autistic kids you just can’t get angry or sad, you just have to laugh and when you laugh with them everything is just so much better.
- Happiness – happiness is a choice, wise words from someone who knows – Bears Barry Neil Kaufman. You can choose to be happy or sad in any situation – it is your choice, you just have to make that decision, and happy feels much better than sad. It also seems that Autistic persons are very sensitive to your vibes and will reflect and amplify on how you feel.
- Unconditional Love – “all you need is love!” So very true. When you love someone just for who they are and nothing more – no judgments – no conditions – that is true, pure love. You can’t get better than that. And for the recipient – ten fold. Children, Adults, disability or not, we all do better when we are truly unconditionally loved.
These are just some of the things that we have learned from our Autistic daughter, and to tell you the truth we wouldn’t have it any different, we just love her for who she is – no conditions.
“The way you choose to see the world creates the world you see!”
Have a fantastic and inspiring New Year 2011
© 2010 – 2011, EJ Banon. All rights reserved.